A few people are privy to the fact that I have been struggling very hard with depression for about the last two years. Some days, I feel much better and start to have hope that the tide has turned and I am starting to be closer to my own self. Other days (typically nights) are much much harder. I went to bed last night just after 11, feeling rejected for the stupidest of all reasons. The feeling of rejection just got worse and worse as I lay there and, pretty soon, the tears were rolling. For some reason, I try very hard not to let Jay know how bad it really is so I cry very quietly or I get up and leave the room. He is a sound sleeper and rarely notices anyway.
I finally drifted off to sleep well after 1 am and relieved once the sun finally came up morning, since Sam woke me up before 6.
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I am so sorry to hear that you are still struggling so. I hope that you get some inspiration and encouragement from reading my blog. It has been a great source of therapy for me.
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